Monday, February 05, 2007

how to turn extraordinarily blue

Well, I guess this is one of the crucial questions that i should be solving when my blog is called extra-terrestrially blue. I think I thought of that question yesterday when remembering my mom. Being so far away and so incredibly immature (as I've been recently described), when I get scared (...like when there's a monster below my bed...or when the f***ng switch of my flat makes that damn buzzing noise and I don't know why, or when the damn scallies are outside my flat being nasty) I hug my bear (yeah! I don't care the immigration officer's opinion when he asks "you do study a PhD right?" after getting a glance of my Fuzzy bear) and start thinking about my mom. When I was little, so little I was barely visible (as you can witness how little I still am) my mom used to tell me stories when trying to make me sleep without using chloroform, valium or any other non-admited way of sleeping children... One of those days when she was R-E-A-L-L-Y tired and I was particularly annoying, and she had already ran out of reused stories, she started talking about the story of why my (then favourite, now disappeared) blue carebear was blue. It went something like this:

Mom: "Once upon a time, there was this really nice, easy going, friendly bear who liked very much to sleep (thus the name sleepybear). Although he was very nice he also was quite stubborn and always wanted to do his will. He lived in a cabin in the middle of the forest with another friend. Both of them were very beautiful brown bears (such as bears should be) and were very good friends. Surrounding the cabin there was a bush of very nice blue berries which were nourished by the bigger bear (the one that wasn't sleepy bear)....... Then, you have to integrate x squared from zero to..."
Me: "Huh????!!!! Mooooooooooooooooom you're sleeping!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Mom: "Wha..? where? oh, sorry.... Ok, where was I? Oh, ok... the bigger bear loved his blueberries and was taking care of them for the annual marmalade fair in town, he was aware of how..... the circumpherence of a circle can be calculated as...."
Me: "Moooooooooooooooooom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Mom: oh yeah... Ok, the bigger bear was aware of how much sleepy bear wanted to get a taste of the blueberries, and always reminded him that he would have to wait until they were ripe enough to eat.... because when the electric resistance is calculated by the sine of the.....
Me: "aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! what??????????"
Mom:" oh, sorry.... Then there was one day, when bigger bear went out to get some groceries. As usual he reminded sleepy bear not to eat the blueberries because they weren't ripe enough. Anyway, he went to the grocery store and left sleepy bear. Sleepy bear was really trying not to look at the blueberries which could be seen from his window, but he couldn't help it and he went out to get some and calm his apetite..... which by the way can be described as an hyperbolic trajectory...."
Me: "damn!"
Mom: "....was I sleeping? ok, well, as you know, blueberries when they have still not ripened have a very different colour which is kind of turquoisish or acqua, and that is because they haven't become completely blue. Well, after eating the unripened blueberries, sleepy bear started feeling a little ill, and then he realised that something funny was happening to him, he was turning blue!!!!! Of course, when he came back, bigger bear realised that sleepy bear had eaten a big amount of his precious blueberries. He was not mad, he was actually amused by the fact that sleepy bear was now blue, he cared for sleepy bear while he felt ill (which was about a week....."
Me: "zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"

So I didn't get to hear what happened after that... and of course my mom didn't remember anything the next day because she was making all up. And that is one of the ways one can turn blue, and also that is the reason why I believe that acqua is a kind of blue, when everybody else thinks (wrongly) that it's actually a kind of green.

Additional comments about this post:
  • Yes, I did have a carebear which is cheesy, and I don't care
  • Yes, I do have a fuzzy bear with which I usually sleep and which I hug vehemently when scared.... I don't care
  • Yes, I know I souldn't be telling this kind of stories because they're cheesy... I don't care
  • Yes, I'm immature... I'm trying to deal with it.... I'm also trying to deal with global warming and can't do anything about it.
  • Yes, I haven't finished my damn article which is due next week.... I do care... so I'll start right now.

4 comments:

Victor said...

oh...my...god...freaking...long....

Blue carebear: ha-ha!

I, as every real man should, only know 8 colors: green,red,yellow,blue,orange,brown,pruple and gray (as we all know black and white aren't really colors).

Things like turquoise and aqua are just different names for blue and green.

ngo said...

It is long but its nice to remember that kind of stories your parents would invent so u would do what u were told to. I remember my mom invented a story so my sisters and me finished our peas. That is the only time i have eaten them...hehehe.

aDn said...

it's fun to imagine you using the same "oh...my...God.." as Janice, Chandler's girlfriend... HAHA!

Caleb Rascon said...

so you're mom math dreamtalks? wow... i thought i was the only one =P