EL UNGÜENTO VETERINARIO DE MI TÍA

hi dee hoo little precious creatures of creation (cr*p that's what happens when f***ng abc 1 in freeview doesn't show anything else than Home Improvement)... today we'll talk about an ointment old as life itself used by my parents to give their children (me and my siblings of course) a sense of safety and prompt healing, the miracle performing "ungüento veterinario de la tía" (veterinary ointment of the... aunt?... whose aunt anyway!!!???) created by the world famous "Ordoñez" laboratories in México city. First of all, I have to confess that, although the fact that the name said "veterinary ointment" seemed a little odd, i have never doubted of it's prestige, curative powers and world fame until I came back to Manchester and my really funny former housemates, who by the way had never heard of anything like it, started mocking me for having a veterinary ointment. It never ocurred to me that, the fact that you could only find it in veterinary shops was because it was meant to use it as a VETERINARY OINTMENT!!!!

Anyway, I am writing about it today because while rubbing this curative thing on a bruise that I made myself by skating and trying to stop using the technique of sliding on the floor (which by the way only works on ice) (long sentence now, difficult to follow... I don't care) I read on the label of its very vintage aluminium tin, that it is used as "auxiliary to swelling caused by bruising, in small wounds" and that it is used to avoid "bacterian contamination and to promote cicatrization" (does that word even exist? actually it does according to babylon).

So, all this time, a lot of time to be precise, I have been using an ointment to heal my bruises and other muscular pains which is actually intended to promote cicatrization!!!!

And that my friends, seemed funny enough to write it down in this blog which (now it is official) nobody cares to read but me!!!!

Still I must say that the "ungüento" is either the best placebo ever, or it really works on bruises, because you could never beat the soothing feeling it leaves after having rubbing it. I strongly recommend it!